Looking for Change
by 21xJoKeRx13
Summary: \One-shot/ Ichimaru Gin was obsessed with changing everything about himself, except himself. /Character Death   Spoilers\/Slight Gin/Rangiku, Gin/Kira, or Gin/Hitsu\


Ichimaru Gin was always a man of interest. All that encountered him found him as friendly, so much so that they became uncomfortable and regretted ever needing to speak to the ghostly captain on any occasion. The funny thing about Gin's character was that he knew people were uncomfortable around him.

And that is exactly the reason he urged himself to be overly creepy, especially near those unseated officers.

He remembered walking over the bridge to the younger, adopted Kuchiki's execution. Meters away he saw her shudder and her opal eyes widen, her mask of acceptance shattering to her feet. Getting too close and just smiling at her, asking about the weather and her thoughts, just enough to crack the sliver of uneasiness wide open. Her scream behind him: he was satisfied.

Digressing: Ichimaru Gin was that one guy at work that everyone whispered about as infrequently as they could, as all expected him to be perched on a banister a foot away, keen on hearing the gossip of the day. Gin enjoyed his privacy, but indulged in everyone else's. Like when he snuck into the sixth division barracks to find a rumors diary of a certain, up-tight captain's. Unfortunately, he returned empty-handed, and a crazy monkey man trying to kick him out as respectfully as possible. Ichimaru enjoyed the pineapple-boy's face when he asked if he was his superior, and the redhead started bowing fervently in apology.

Abusing his power was another perk, obviously. Being of captain rank, he was on equal playing field of all in the soul society (besides old man Yamamoto), and even more in power by the unnerving effect he had on them. Izuru Kira, his lieutenant, was his favorite underling. Not just because they saw each other most frequently, but even with his ability to creep out others: Izuru was uneasy _all _the time. Kira was a string around his finger being played with constantly when it shifted the wrong way, and was promptly put back in place. Even when Kira protected him from Hinamori, Sousuke's lieutenant, he showed a side that Gin wanted no one to see again.

Ah, getting off track again.

A man of many amusements, Gin's one fascination was with that of change. He loved instilling different emotions into people that would not be seen under normal circumstances. He loved destroying, and watching the reconstruction of what was broken. He loved breaking, tearing, shredding, and maiming whatever form of good came near him, just to see if it had any fight-back.

Most importantly, he wanted to change his life. Nothing drastic, like his personality or choice of best friends (alright, that one is a bit iffy), but more so where he was going with it. As a child, he was innocent, friendly, and just a little disturbing. In the academy, he met his match: Aizen, and followed the course of destruction he so adored. Now, he was in his office, in complete power, amused with his subordinates reactions and all those around him.

How dull.

Something needed to change. He prayed to whatever God listened, that Aizen's plan would succeed. He would not accept its failure—he was the man that wanted to destroy the perfectionist that had crossed him. Aizen was a good man, when he meant to be, but only on the outside. Just as Gin appeared friendly, but had darker intentions. The dark intentions of Sousuke worried him more. He vaguely wondered which Aizen was real, the good mask, or the villain beneath.

He had to get out of here. Out of Soul Society. On to bigger and better things.

* * *

><p>Hueco Mundo was Ichimaru's new place of residence. He hated the damn place, and not just the retarded hollow creations of his lord, Aizen. He wanted to use Shinsou to paint the ungodly white walls with everyone's blood, to rid himself of the color. White was the absence of color, and a sign of everything pure. Like his hair, like Ukitake's, like the uniforms they were all forced into and accustomed to.<p>

Whenever he saw the ghastly absence he thought of that ridiculous boy Toshiro. Even his _name _struck a chord with him. As Aizen's plan fell into place, the short captain had always been right on their heels. From the fight in the third division barracks after Hinamori's attack of revenge on him, the captain was set on doing what Ichimaru loved: destroying. Even if Kira was in the way, even if Hinamori was bleeding onto the ground before them—he would destroy _Ichimaru Gin. _He was flattered, really, to have the tiny prodigy use his temper tantrums productively directed at him. Hitsugaya was hell-bent on making Ichimaru see the error of his ways, and take satisfaction in his regrets of his choices. Ichimaru, of course, would not feel regret.

He had been incorrect to assume Ichimaru was behind the whole plot. He was a pawn, nothing more. Aizen staged the entire scene himself, but hadn't expected Hinamori to live through her battle with Gin and Kira. That was soon fixed in their barracks. Then the silly absence-haired boy had to be on their heels once more, and even use his zanpakutou's special ability in their battle. Aizen stole Gin's fun—Gin wanted to skewer the boy and all his innocence into the wall until he could no longer move. Toshiro was the one captain Ichimaru feared, because he thought he had the most potential to become what he wouldn't wish upon another being: himself.

Gin was in a rut, a deep, well thought out rut. Wandering Hueco Mundo with Aizen, the Espada now fondly referred to him as "Lap Dog", "Tag-along", or "Aizen's Pet Fox." These were ridiculous, of course, as Aizen was obviously more of a cat person.

He would have never imagined he would hate this plan so much.

He vaguely wondered if he even wanted to look forward to the rest of Aizen's plan to invade Karakura Town. It was all faked, just like everything Aizen did. He could obliterate all the scenery and not feel the satisfaction of actually ridding the place of said scenery.

He needed a plan to give himself amusement. Soon, pestering Schiffer would become as dull as the color scheme of the forsaken fortress. Stop thinking about the Soul Society; they were long gone and had forgotten how they used to view him. He was an enemy now, not a creeping associate.

Perhaps he would attempt to destroy Aizen, now…

* * *

><p>A horrible plan, and poorly executed at that.<p>

He enjoyed tricking that berry-headed substitute shinigami, vizard, whatever he was considered. His bankai was not so simple; his shikai was what had mastered that ability. He almost praised the fake Karakura town for being so easy to tear apart, or the plan may not have worked.

He was so glad to see Izuru and Rangiku…more so Izuru, that he had not been blamed for his mistakes. Rangiku would never forgive him, even if he gave her the pleasure of speaking to his old friend.

He wouldn't speak to her again; he wouldn't want to have an adverse effect on her charming self.

Now, to get Aizen alone. The ex-division 5 captain would probably get rid of his attackers soon, especially now that he was beginning his transformation.

* * *

><p>So foolish. He'd be absolutely foolish. How could he have not expected <em>Aizen Sousuke <em>to have another trick up his sleeve. Gin should have expected him to have his power after retrieving the Hogyoku. He should have expected Aizen to suspect he was up to something when he lied about killing Matsumoto. He was a snake, indeed, but he'd also lied about having no feelings.

He wished to destroy those too, but it seems as he wouldn't get the chance.

Aizen retreated, and he couldn't move. He was stuck against this stupid slab of concrete he'd be thrown into from his attack. He almost wished he had killed Matsumoto, in some sick chance that he'd see her again, but this time that she'd be the one helping him to his feet in the afterlife, repaying the service he did so long ago.

He also wanted to see Izuru, perhaps as a chance to apologize for all the abuse he'd dealt with for being in relation to the captain. He had been the only shinigami besides Rangiku that trusted him, not because it was his duty, either. Trust was a tough word, but maybe that's why the small vice captain obeyed and protected without needing instruction constantly.

Even now, going numb, he wanted to see the pure and spiky-haired chibi-taichou. He wanted to poke and prod him into blushing like he had grown so accustomed to doing every day. He wanted to look over his shoulder or down the divisions and see smoldering ice-cube eyes staring through him, watching his every move. He wanted to fight him again, and hold back even more so just to see the younger boy screaming in rage, and would allow him to get the revenge he so desired.

Most of all, he wanted to see the boy so he could take satisfaction in that Ichimaru did hold regret.

Life was no fun without change, and without change, he wouldn't know what he would ever become. He never looked back at the past before, he couldn't change it. He wanted to change everything that would happen later.

But then why, now, was he remembering all those he'd crossed? He couldn't change what he'd done. They were the past, and the past was forgettable.

He didn't think you could be so numb it hurt, but he carefully closed his eyes even more so, relaxed, unlike his normal fox face.

Was it raining? He hadn't heard a storm, but perhaps it was just the irony of the story that a storm had come and signaling the shinigami's defeat. The rain was certainly uneven, at least, and something loud had woken him up.

"Gin… Ichimaru!" He heard this time, closer that he would have imagined. He slowly and carefully opened his eyes, slanted and icy colored eyes peeking past his hair.

Considering the large breasts he was first greeted by, this must be Rangiku.

Wait, was she…crying?

"Rangiku…" He said, hoarsely. He was amazed a sound even came from his lips. She looked down at him abruptly, surprised as well.

"Gin! I..I'm s-"

"Don't waste yer breath, Ran-chan…" He forced a smile, not getting the effect he wanted. He was much too used to his sinister grin. He soon noticed someone else standing over him, and he hoped that was the sun glaring down and not his actual hair color.

Oh, that was berry-head. His vision was starting to go out now…inevitably. He must've looked dead as a post if Rangiku was crying and not screaming for help.

No, he was beyond any help they would offer. They wouldn't even offer.

Rangiku must not have noticed Ichigo, but he certainly wasn't making his presence known.

"You," Gin said, barely, but had apparently gotten their attention. "Kill…him. Aizen." He recovered from the speech problem, being specific as usual.

"I will." His voice was strong and determined. Gin believed he would fulfill his request, whether it was for him or not. Gin's eyes fluttered close to closing again, a sudden rush of weakness slapping him in the face. He was weak a long time ago, but he figured it was time to call it quits. He wouldn't get to destroy Aizen. He couldn't even move on to a new chapter, bother short captains, and embarrass his subordinates…

"Bye bye, Rangiku…"

At least with his death, there was a glimmer of hope that things would be rebuilt, and the past would be forgotten.

* * *

><p>AN: I know this is super random, but Gin is pretty much my favorite character up there with Szayel. I hope this isn't too drably, I just watched an AMV to Gin and the song inspired this.

Link to the AMV: www. youtube .com/watch?v=CEdX4E3KHA4 without spaces.

Please enjoy, this is my first one shot. And if you didn't enjoy, well, thanks for stopping by.


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